failure

i really don't know what made me think that i could commit to a blog. this always happens. i start off okay and then it just gets worse and worse.

i really don't have anything to share.. and most of the people who read this i already speak with on fairly regular intervals.

my apartment has a lot of fruit flies in it. i don't know why.. as i don't have any fruit laying around or old trash or anything. i cleaned my kitchen again to be double sure but they are still lingering around making me feel really gross.

my friend kevin was in town this weekend and it was wonderful. i met some new people via his friends and his friends of friends. so that was nice. i also had some weird things happen.. yesterday someone made a comment that all the weird shit happens to me. it's really true. if something bizarre and out of the ordinary is going to happen, it will happen to me. this used to happen even more often when i used to smoke pot.

it's an odd phenomenon.

lame prophecies

i got a job offer. it is in austin. i am geographically challenged.

i miss my friends. they are scattered everywhere. let's buy an island?

i play video games.. i decorate my future apartment in my head. i am reading bridget jones's diary right now which is surprisingly not terrible. it is actually very funny. i have lost on the tivo but have yet to watch it.

everyone i know is a pisces. so happy birthday to all my pisces friends: my mom, amber, jessica, ginny, mary, ian, y mas.

i am really glad that it will be a while before i have to wear a suit and panty hose again. nothing makes me feel worse. don't get me started on the female suit. it is the worst invention ever. if you want to look like some sort of triangular joyless hermaphrodite than putting on a pants suit is definitely the way to go.

i saw of montreal last weekend. it was pretty cool but something about it was kind of creepy. the lead singer slinked around in shiny clothes and made me feel strange. drug-like kind of. enjoyable but a tad unsettling. people wanted them to play the commercial for outback steak house? which is wraith pinned to mist and other games.. but maybe someone legitimately wanted to hear the jingle. kind of odd.

i always know where i am going to work before i get offered a job there. when i first walked into the building of this company i felt like i was going to work there. when i applied to richmond camera i had a dream i got the job that night. what a lame thing to be prophetic about.

jorbs

job hunting is the absolute worst. today i saw a very appealing ad on the austin american statesman job site. there is a phone number listed so i call it. suddenly i am talking to some slick dude who is telling me about a 29.99 fee to list my resume and all this crap and i just freak out and hang up.

that is just wrong. anyways. i have an appointment with a headhunter in austin on friday. i am hoping it is super warm because i want to go swimming more than anything right now.

i have been reading an amazing book about writing. it isn't about technique or anything but about how to tune your mind. they talked about stuff i had always thought i was doing wrong but it turns out i was right all along. i always thought it was to kind of tune out when you're writing and just let it kinda go but apparently that is what you are supposed to do.

finally i got something in life right! shazam.

also some guy tried to pick me up in target yesterday. it was hilariously awkward and involved like some target employee, a pack of dividers and me making up some lies. i hate to lie. sometimes i have no choice.

dmv

today i went to the dmv.

the thing that really stands out about going to the dmv is the employees. you know that they have done their designated task perhaps millions of times and so if you fuck up the routine in the slightest you feel like such a jerk.

i failed to read the 5th line of the eye test all the way through and i could just feel the annoyance in the air. i almost signed the electronic pad with a real pen. the shame!

earlier in the waiting room, there was a woman with a neon pink shirt that read something like "Sleazy Bar Crawl 1992". the graphics of a slutty woman and some dude smoking a cig looked like i made them on paint at the time of the event. the woman wearing the shirt also had a neck tattoo to boot.

i also saw the most extreme combover ever fashioned. real talent.

when i came home after the dmv, getting my oil changed and my car cleaned, i watched 24. apparently they are doing the whole angelic president and demonic vice-president device again. i've only seen one and a half seasons of the show and already it is like same song second verse. yawn.

i am waiting for lost to start up again i guess. i am ambivalent about it - but i may just watch it so i can make myspace comments about it on people's pages.

clown tears

welcome to clown-tears.blogspot.com. enjoy the creepy sadness.